FAITH-BASED
At the core of many couples' commitment to one another is their personal and combined decision to honor their cultural traditions or their faith in their marriage. As a foundational building block upon which couples choose to build their lives together they can give recognition to these values in their ceremony and in their vows to one another.
When planning a faith-based ceremony (and especially if held in a place of worship) it is always best to chat with your officiant first so they can make clear whether or not you will be required to say all or only part of the traditional vows associated with your religion in the service and have them give you some helpful guidelines.
JEWISH
With a ceremony performed by a Rabbi and held beneath the Chuppah (altar) jewish wedding vows are spoken in Hebrew and the couple often will say to one another:
"I am my beloved's and my beloved is mine."
Alongside the exchange of the rings Sheva B’rachot or the Seven Blessings is recited over the couple often in both Hebrew and English by family members and friends:
Blessed are You, Adonai, our God, Ruler of the universe, gladden the beloved companions as You gladdeed Your creatures in the garden of Eden. Blessed are You, Adonai, Who gladdens this couple. Blessed are You, Adonai, our God, Ruler of the universe, Who created joy and gladness, loving couples, mirth, glad song, pleasure, delight, love, loving communities, peace, and companionship. Adonai, our God, let there soon be heard….the voice of the loving couple, the sound of their jubilance from their canopies and of the youths from their song-filled feasts. Blessed are You Who causes the couple to rejoice, one with the other.
We bless God for creating joy and happiness, bride and groom, mirth song, gladness and rejoicing, love and harmony, peace and companionship, and we thank God for letting this bride and groom to rejoice together.
Traditionally, both sets of parents will also stand under the chuppah alongside the bride and groom and rabbi for the duration of the ceremony.
HINDU VOWS
With the ceremony taking place beneath the wedding mandap (an elaborately decorated wedding arbour constructed for the ceremony) the vows are spoken around the sacred fire of Agni. Traditionally known as Saptadi, these 7 vows are one of the most important rituals of Hindu Marriage or Hindu Weddings. Based on sacred Hindu scripture the bride and groom walk seven times around the fire with the groom reciting the first four vows and the bride reciting the remaining three.
1. Let us take the first step to provide for our household a boursihing and pure diet, avoiding those foods injurious to healthy living.
2. Let us take the second step to develop physical, mental and spiritual powers.
3. Let us take the third step to increase our wealth by righteous means and proper use.
4. Let us take the fourth step to acquire knowledge, happiness, and harmony by mutual love and trust.
5. Let us take the fifth step so that we are blessed with strong, virtuous, and heroic children.
6. Let us take the sixth step for self-restraint and longevity.
7. Finally, let us take the seventh step and be true companions and remain lifelong partners by this wedlock.
After reciting the seven vows, the bride who was originally seated on the right hand side of the groom is now seated on the left to indicate that she is now seated closer to his heart.
MUSLIM WEDDING VOWS
Traditionally muslim couples will not recite vows during their ceremony. The imam or cleric will rather share words with the couple about the meaning of marriage and the bride and groom's responsibility within the marriage to each other and to Allah.
At the end of the ceremony the couple consents to becoming husband and wife entering the nikah, or marriage contract, in the presence of the congregation who then blesses the union. Some Muslim couples may still choose to recite vows as well with the following being a common recitation:
Bride: "I offer you myself in marriage in accordance with the instructions of the Holy Quran and the Holy Prophet, peace and blessing be upon him. I pledge, in honesty and with sincerity, to be for you an obedient and faithful wife."
Groom: "I pledge, in honesty and sincerity, to be for you a faithful and helpful husband."
PROTESTANT WEDDING VOWS
Almost identical to traditional vows with the point of difference being the acknowledgement of God these well worded vows form the basic structure upon which most modern vows are built.
In the name of God, I,....., take you,....., to be my (husband/wife), to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until we are parted by death. This is my solemn vow.
CATHOLIC
Before reciting vows the couple will usually answer three questions asked by the priest:
“ ..... and ....., have you come here freely and without reservation to give yourselves to each other in marriage?”
“Will you honor each other as man and wife for the rest of your lives?”
“Will you accept children lovingly from God and bring them up according to the law of Christ and his Church?”
The bride and groom either respond with “yes” or “I will”. The couple will then move on to sharing the vows
I,..... , take you,....., to be my (husband/wife). I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life.
BUDDHIST
In traditional Buddhist ceremonies couples respond to the vows read by the officiant with a ‘We do’ or ‘We will’, essentially offering unified agreement to the covenants read out:
Officiant: and do you pledge to help each other to develop your hearts and minds, cultivating compassion, generosity, ethics, patience, enthusiasm, concentration, and wisdom as you age and undergo the various ups and downs of life and to transform them into the path of love, compassion, joy and equanimity?
Bride/Groom: “We do.”
Officiant: Recognising that the external conditions in life will not always be smooth and that internally your own minds and emotions will sometimes get stuck in negativity, do you pledge to see all these circumstances as a challenge to help you grow, to open your hearts, to accept yourselves, and each other; and to generate compassion for others who are suffering?
Bride/Groom: “We do.”
Officiant: Understanding that just as we are a mystery to ourselves, each other person is also a mystery to us, do you pledge to seek to understand yourselves, each other, and all living beings, to examine your own minds continually and to regard all the mysteries of life with curiosity and joy?
Bride/Groom: “ We do”
Officiant: Do you pledge to preserve and enrich your affection for each other, and to share it with all beings? To take the loving feelings you have for one another and your vision of each other’s potential and inner beauty as an example and rather than spiraling inwards and becoming self-absorbed, to radiate this love outwards to all beings?
Bride/Groom: “We do.”
A joyous process, a creative process and a heartfelt process capturing with words the lifelong decrees and promises you speak to each other on your wedding day doesn’t have to be an arduous affair.
